Strength in Numbers
I love driving. Just put on some good music, give me some great weather, take about 100 cars and trucks off the road, and I can totally get lost in my own thoughts as I cruise down the asphalt.
Today I drove back from a short trip to Chapel Hill. My best time leaving UNC's campus and pulling into my driveway in Charlotte has always been about two hours even. I don't think I've ever done it under two.
I was on my way to breaking that record this afternoon. The best way to drive on the highway is to get yourself caught up in a train of speeders. Go the speed limit until you see a line of cars coming up behind you in the fast lane. Pull to the right, let one or two cars get ahead, then look for your window of opportunity, and jump back into the fast lane in the middle of the line.
Now, if you pass an officer on the side of the road, chances are if he decides to go after 10 speeding cars, he'll either go for the head of the pack, the one setting the pace, or he'll pick off the poor guy in the back of the line because he's an easier catch. You're safer being one of the bland guys caught in the middle. Just pray he doesn't call for backup.
So that happened today. It all came together perfectly. There was no train of cars that came upon me. Just one Volkswagen that shot past going about 90 mph. He gets way ahead, and I almost start cursing him for going so fast. Then I notice a girl to my right who starts going faster too. So I take a chance and start following her.
So now there's two of us going really fast down the highway. We pass a few cars on the right, and one of them, fed up from being behind a slow person, pulls out and speeds to catch up to me.
Way up ahead, Volkswagen Guy has slowed down for some reason, but when he sees us pass him by, he jumps in line behind the girl behind me.
So now there's four of us flying down 85. When we catch a slow car in the fast lane in front of us, the leader puts on her signal and merges to the right. Then I follow suit. Then the girl behind me. Then Volkswagen Guy.
Watching this occur in my rearview mirror was like seeing a snake undulate its body on a sidewalk. It all felt so incredibly coordinated; every merge was smooth and timely. We were of a hive mind. We are Borg.
A little bit later, we catch up to a Mustang from Maryland that passed me an hour earlier as I came out of Chapel Hill. He watches all of us pass and jumps into the train too.
We're animals of the concrete jungle, banding together for strength, hoping the predatory cops will grab only one of us. We're that school of fish that dolphins plunge into, jaws agape.
It was a smooth ride until we came upon a slow person in the fast lane (reeeeeally slow, like speed limit slow), and the leader hesitated too long in deciding to merge to the right. In doing so, Volkswagen Guy got caught behind Slowpoke and beside a faster car that had caught up to us in the right lane. The first three of us made it out. As we sped up the road, I saw VG shrink in the distance of my rearview mirror.
I wanted to yell out "Man Down!" and slow the train so he could catch up. Our group just went from five to three. Danger, Will Robinson.
Eventually he did catch up, but the damage had been done. The snake had been cut. The girl behind me grew impatient and sped off on her solitary life. Leader merged to the right, dropped her speed about 20 mph, and eventually pulled onto an exit ramp. I wanted to wave everyone off, give them a farewell smile. But I drifted back to a speed much closer to the limit. We all went back to being loners.
But it was fun while it lasted. Single serving driving buddies.
--Cbake
Today I drove back from a short trip to Chapel Hill. My best time leaving UNC's campus and pulling into my driveway in Charlotte has always been about two hours even. I don't think I've ever done it under two.
I was on my way to breaking that record this afternoon. The best way to drive on the highway is to get yourself caught up in a train of speeders. Go the speed limit until you see a line of cars coming up behind you in the fast lane. Pull to the right, let one or two cars get ahead, then look for your window of opportunity, and jump back into the fast lane in the middle of the line.
Now, if you pass an officer on the side of the road, chances are if he decides to go after 10 speeding cars, he'll either go for the head of the pack, the one setting the pace, or he'll pick off the poor guy in the back of the line because he's an easier catch. You're safer being one of the bland guys caught in the middle. Just pray he doesn't call for backup.
So that happened today. It all came together perfectly. There was no train of cars that came upon me. Just one Volkswagen that shot past going about 90 mph. He gets way ahead, and I almost start cursing him for going so fast. Then I notice a girl to my right who starts going faster too. So I take a chance and start following her.
So now there's two of us going really fast down the highway. We pass a few cars on the right, and one of them, fed up from being behind a slow person, pulls out and speeds to catch up to me.
Way up ahead, Volkswagen Guy has slowed down for some reason, but when he sees us pass him by, he jumps in line behind the girl behind me.
So now there's four of us flying down 85. When we catch a slow car in the fast lane in front of us, the leader puts on her signal and merges to the right. Then I follow suit. Then the girl behind me. Then Volkswagen Guy.
Watching this occur in my rearview mirror was like seeing a snake undulate its body on a sidewalk. It all felt so incredibly coordinated; every merge was smooth and timely. We were of a hive mind. We are Borg.
A little bit later, we catch up to a Mustang from Maryland that passed me an hour earlier as I came out of Chapel Hill. He watches all of us pass and jumps into the train too.
We're animals of the concrete jungle, banding together for strength, hoping the predatory cops will grab only one of us. We're that school of fish that dolphins plunge into, jaws agape.
It was a smooth ride until we came upon a slow person in the fast lane (reeeeeally slow, like speed limit slow), and the leader hesitated too long in deciding to merge to the right. In doing so, Volkswagen Guy got caught behind Slowpoke and beside a faster car that had caught up to us in the right lane. The first three of us made it out. As we sped up the road, I saw VG shrink in the distance of my rearview mirror.
I wanted to yell out "Man Down!" and slow the train so he could catch up. Our group just went from five to three. Danger, Will Robinson.
Eventually he did catch up, but the damage had been done. The snake had been cut. The girl behind me grew impatient and sped off on her solitary life. Leader merged to the right, dropped her speed about 20 mph, and eventually pulled onto an exit ramp. I wanted to wave everyone off, give them a farewell smile. But I drifted back to a speed much closer to the limit. We all went back to being loners.
But it was fun while it lasted. Single serving driving buddies.
--Cbake
posted by Cbake at 12:39 AM
2 Comments:
you are a bad boy. speeding like that! time out for you mister!
xoxo Allie
Psssh You are a highway noobie. Your best friend on the highway are trucks. Find a truck going fast and THATS your convoy. If you wanna get fancy, you draft for fuel economy. Oops I mean, Speeding is dangerous, and don't call the passing lane the "fast" lane.
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