"Ho ho ho! Merry Everyone!"
--Homer Simpson
First off, let me wish that everyone had a Happy Chrismahannakwanzakka! Second, let me forewarn everyone that this will be a long post covering everything from my birthday, to skiing, to Christmas and beyond. I'll have them broken into sub-sections, so not to worry. You can extend the reading over a few days if you truly wish.
23: One year closer to 30
I finally turned 23 on December 21. And it felt kind of weird. Maybe it was because I was celebrating my birthday in Aspen, Colorado (such a terrible place to be). Or maybe it was because my dad married his girlfriend on that day, so I now have a stepmom and a younger stepbrother and stepsister. Boy, that feels weird to finally say.
Or maybe its because there just isn't that much to celebrate with turning 23. Since age 13 you kind of had something to look forward to with each birthday.
13- Yay, I'm a teenager!
14- Yay, I'm an older teenager!
15- Yay, I can drive....limitedly!
16- Yay, I can drive all the freakin' time if I have a car and if my parents allow it!
17- Sweet, I can get into R rated movies!
18- F*** yeah! I can buy smokes, porno, vote, and go die for my country! But I can't have a celebratory beer over it yet. Damn.
19- My last year of being a teenager! Soon I'll be a "mature" and "cool" "Adult".
20- Uhh...well, one year closer to 21!
21- Sweetness! I can go out and drink with the best of them!
22- I'm uh... graduating from college this year. Whoopee?
23- I'm jobless... and living at home, and... I'm... closer to 30... *sigh*
See what I mean? And I think being away from home, some people forgot about my birthday. I didn't get anything from my grandparents (not even a card... yet), but I can forgive them for that. Didn't get anything from my brother either, but both he and I are broke, so that's excusable too.
Snowboarding sucks... when you don't have health insurance.
So, as most of you know, my dad and his then fiance took her two kids and my brother and me to Aspen for a skiing trip in Snowmass village from Dec. 18-24. It sucked.
Just kidding. It rocked. It took my brother and I a day to get used to skiing again. It's a little bit tougher out there in Aspen, when compared to Snowshoe, West Virginia, or whatever day-trip you can make in North Carolina. Out there is a little more intimidating, because come on, its freaking Aspen, Colorado. So the first day Nick and I took a few plunges into the snow, but by the second day we were golden.
On the fourth day we all tried snowboarding. Nick picked it up pretty quickly. My dad and I had far more problems. After a few hours of falling on my wrists and butt, I got used to being able to slow down, and could go down the mountain fairly easily when leaning back on my heels. But its the leaning forward on my toes part I couldn't perfect. Each attempt ended with me falling over on my face or losing control and sliding off-course. And each fall inflamed my left wrist, near where I broke my arm a few years back. And don't get me started on how difficult and confusing getting off a ski-lift can be. Don't even get me started.
So later in the afternoon, after a quick lunch-break, I go back out with my brother and he attempts to teach me how to get the toe-part down. We get off the ski-lift and he surfs down an easy hill. I turn my body around, so I'm facing uphill, and try the leaning on the toe bit. Everything was going pretty well- I was slowing down, I was in control, I was having fun- when suddenly something happened, my board tipped over, and I fell backwards. My head hit the ice with a sickening thud, and my wrist was throbbing in pain.
I sit up with my head in my hands. A skier rides by - "You okay?" she asks.
"Yeah, sure, just taking a break," I reply, trying to ignore pulsing pain in my head. My brother takes a seat further on down the hill. After a few minutes of rest, I slide down and take a seat next to him, but he gets up and boards away impatiently, unaware of my bad fall. I tell him what happened, and as inevitably happened after almost every conversation we had that week, it ends in a small argument, and he boards away. I get up and try one last time to get the toe part right, and as I'm sliding down the hill, I lost control yet again, fall onto my back, and slide off-course into what looks like a bunch of deep, packed up snow next to a lodge. So I reach out my hands to try and slow down my impending doom.
I was wrong. It wasn't packed up snow, it was packed up ice, and pocketed with holes from where people had stepped into it. So I slide into it and over it, the holes killing my butt and my back. My left hand hits the ice and the holes with great force, bouncing over all the pockets, until I finally stop. And I just lie there, staring up at the clouds and the great blue yonder.
Now my butt, back, head, and wrists hurt like hell. And this time, I think I did some real significant damage to my wrists again, it hurts that much when I bend it in any direction.
"@#$% this."
I am NOT going to spend my Christmas worrying about how I'm going to pay my doctor's bills because I am without any form of health insurance and because I've re-broken my arm at the wrist. So I go back inside. Take off my clothes. Park myself right in front of the television for the next few hours.
The next day I traded in my snowboard for skis. And everything was hunky-dory for my last day on the slopes.
Parting thoughts
Everyone who works in Aspen is from a different part of the world it seems- Australia, Ireland, South Africa- everyone's nametags tell where they are from. Nick said he'd love to come work in Aspen one winter and just ski all day. I wouldn't mind. But in the end, I think I still prefer the beach to the mountains. For one, when you're skiing, everyone is covered up. So if a girl goes by, you really can't tell how good they look, or how old they are, unless you get real nosey and follow them around until they take off a hat or you hear them talk. I can't tell you how many times I saw a cute girl that turned out to be a high-schooler. At least at the beach, everyone is in a bathing suit.
Aspen is a haven for actors and movie stars. Kevin Costner just married his hot young wife there a few months ago, and they might even have a house in the little ski-town. That said, we apparently just missed Chevy Chase as we were getting fitted for snowboards that wednesday morning. An employee came up from the downstairs shop and told the other workers "You guys just missed Chevy Chase." My brother and I wanted to find him and yell out "Hey Chevy! You were the bomb in 'Dirty Work', Yo!"
Dave Miller said we should have challenged him to a wacky race down the mountain. You know someone would have ended up balancing on one ski. Screwball comedy hilarity would most definitely ensue.
Chrismahannakwanzakka? Where?
This year didn't feel like Christmas at all, and I think I know why.
1. No Christmas Tree: Because my dad has pretty much moved into the new house with his new wife, there were no Christmas decorations here at the old house. No Christmas tree, no stockings, no nothing. Now, there was a Christmas tree at the new house, and PLENTY of Christmas decorations down at my mom's house, but not having Christmas in this house just made the holiday feel a little... empty.
2. No Christmas Build-up: The final days leading up to Christmas, the 18-24th, were spent in Aspen, Colorado, so there was no real lead-up to Christmas. We came home late Christmas Eve, and the next day, BAM, was Christmas. It was kinda like being in a coma for most of December and waking up Christmas morning tired, bruised, and broke.
3. No Christmas Shopping: Many of you would be glad to not be out in the crazy crowds on Christmas, but I love it. I used to drive out to the mall just so I could walk around and take in the craziness, to bask in the insanity as these people ran from store to store, arms full of clothes and toys and gifts people probably didn't need. I love being around the high energy of the season like that. But this year, I did none of it. Partly because I was in Colorado. But partly because I did zero shopping because I didn't have the money. Or I DID have the money, but after the shopping I would have had NO money. I didn't buy any presents this year. Not for anyone.
Actually, I take that back, I did buy a small gift for my mother my last day in Aspen, but that was it. I didn't get anything for my dad, brother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, or friends. I didn't even send out Christmas cards like I wanted to. And I hate it. I feel so ashamed, I hate it. I hate not participating in the season, and I hate feeling like a jerk for not buying presents for the first time in many many years.
4. No Christmas TV Specials: "A Charlie Brown Christmas" was the only Christmas special I got to see this year. I missed Frosty. I missed the Grinch. And I MISSED Rudolph.
Crap. I love that Bumble Snow Monster when he has no teeth.
All that said, Christmas Eve at my mother's and Christmas Day at my aunt's and grandmother's was fun. We got to my mom's at 10 PM and had a late dinner. Then we opened gifts. The great thing about my mom is she puts up soooo many Christmas decorations. Even the soap dispenser in the bathroom is a Christmas Bear with presents. It's awesome. And Christmas Carols play all the time in the living room, I love it. And in the morning, the whole family goes to my aunt's house where my uncle cooks up a Christmas feast of pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon. Enough to feed an army, and with 10 kids and 8 adults, you need a lot of food.
My grandmother showed up dressed as Santa with gifts for everyone. That was unexpected and pretty cool. My brother got a bag of beef jerky. I got a DVD set of The Three Stooges.
Later in the afternoon, we all go to my grandmother's (or my Mamere's, those of you who have heard me speak of her) and exchange gifts, and this is where it gets kind of crazy. Take all those kids and adults, put them in one living room, put my brother and I in charge of distributing presents, say "Ready, set, go!" and watch as the floor disappears under shredded wrapping paper, ribbons, and bows. Everyone opens their gifts at once and more often than not, many presents end up getting lost under wrapping paper or larger gifts. And you can always count on my cousin Jacob to whine about not getting as many gifts as the next person. With him it's all about quantity.
Then we all gather in the dining room (kids in the kitchen) and partake in yet ANOTHER feast, this one concocted by my master chef Mamere. Roast beef, mac and cheese, potatoes, croissants, salad, ham, all kinds of desserts... I'm getting hungry just thinking about it.
Anyway, in the interest of making this blogpost a bit shorter, here's a rundown of just about every gift I received for Christmas.
A ski trip to Snowmass
A full body massage
The Return of the King: Extended Edition DVD
Spider-Man 2 DVD
Freddy vs. Jason DVD
AMC's Reel Clues movie board game
The Three Stooges 2 disc DVD set
A book called The Great American Pin-Up
A wizard marionette from Europe made from porcelain, cloth, and real hair
A little blackbook for sketches and writing down ideas that come to me while out and about
Flat bookmark pens for the blackbook with quotes from great people on them
A sweater
Some boxer briefs
A sunglasses holder for my visor in my car
A Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model wall calendar
A Simpsons Trivia desk calendar
A collection of General Mills breakfast cereal icons in Beanie form that my mother bought with saved up UPC symbols back in 1997 or 1998, had stored in the back closet, and forgotten about until she moved last year. This includes beanie versions of Count Chocula, the Cheerios Bee, Bandit the dog from Cookie Crisp, the Lucky Charms Leprechaun, Trix Rabbit, Cuckoo bird from Coco Puffs, and Wendall the chef from Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
A beer stein from Munich
A lighter from Munich
A Cuban cigar (shhh, don't tell anyone)
A candle and candle holder from Prague
A ceramic, handpainted tile from Prague
A little handmade Jamaican dude puppet on a spring (weird to describe, from Europe too)
Gift cards to Best Buy and Gap
Stocking stuffer candy (American and European)
Other, assorted stocking stuff things
That's about it, I think. To those of you that made it this far, congratulations on surviving this long post. I'd give you a prize if I had the money. I hope everyone had a great Chrismahannakwanzakka, or whatever you celebrate, and please feel free to leave comments describing your favorite gift this year, or amusing stories from the holidays. I have updates to the Great Rat War that I will leave later this week.
Until then, ttfn...
--Cbake
First off, let me wish that everyone had a Happy Chrismahannakwanzakka! Second, let me forewarn everyone that this will be a long post covering everything from my birthday, to skiing, to Christmas and beyond. I'll have them broken into sub-sections, so not to worry. You can extend the reading over a few days if you truly wish.
23: One year closer to 30
I finally turned 23 on December 21. And it felt kind of weird. Maybe it was because I was celebrating my birthday in Aspen, Colorado (such a terrible place to be). Or maybe it was because my dad married his girlfriend on that day, so I now have a stepmom and a younger stepbrother and stepsister. Boy, that feels weird to finally say.
Or maybe its because there just isn't that much to celebrate with turning 23. Since age 13 you kind of had something to look forward to with each birthday.
13- Yay, I'm a teenager!
14- Yay, I'm an older teenager!
15- Yay, I can drive....limitedly!
16- Yay, I can drive all the freakin' time if I have a car and if my parents allow it!
17- Sweet, I can get into R rated movies!
18- F*** yeah! I can buy smokes, porno, vote, and go die for my country! But I can't have a celebratory beer over it yet. Damn.
19- My last year of being a teenager! Soon I'll be a "mature" and "cool" "Adult".
20- Uhh...well, one year closer to 21!
21- Sweetness! I can go out and drink with the best of them!
22- I'm uh... graduating from college this year. Whoopee?
23- I'm jobless... and living at home, and... I'm... closer to 30... *sigh*
See what I mean? And I think being away from home, some people forgot about my birthday. I didn't get anything from my grandparents (not even a card... yet), but I can forgive them for that. Didn't get anything from my brother either, but both he and I are broke, so that's excusable too.
Snowboarding sucks... when you don't have health insurance.
So, as most of you know, my dad and his then fiance took her two kids and my brother and me to Aspen for a skiing trip in Snowmass village from Dec. 18-24. It sucked.
Just kidding. It rocked. It took my brother and I a day to get used to skiing again. It's a little bit tougher out there in Aspen, when compared to Snowshoe, West Virginia, or whatever day-trip you can make in North Carolina. Out there is a little more intimidating, because come on, its freaking Aspen, Colorado. So the first day Nick and I took a few plunges into the snow, but by the second day we were golden.
On the fourth day we all tried snowboarding. Nick picked it up pretty quickly. My dad and I had far more problems. After a few hours of falling on my wrists and butt, I got used to being able to slow down, and could go down the mountain fairly easily when leaning back on my heels. But its the leaning forward on my toes part I couldn't perfect. Each attempt ended with me falling over on my face or losing control and sliding off-course. And each fall inflamed my left wrist, near where I broke my arm a few years back. And don't get me started on how difficult and confusing getting off a ski-lift can be. Don't even get me started.
So later in the afternoon, after a quick lunch-break, I go back out with my brother and he attempts to teach me how to get the toe-part down. We get off the ski-lift and he surfs down an easy hill. I turn my body around, so I'm facing uphill, and try the leaning on the toe bit. Everything was going pretty well- I was slowing down, I was in control, I was having fun- when suddenly something happened, my board tipped over, and I fell backwards. My head hit the ice with a sickening thud, and my wrist was throbbing in pain.
I sit up with my head in my hands. A skier rides by - "You okay?" she asks.
"Yeah, sure, just taking a break," I reply, trying to ignore pulsing pain in my head. My brother takes a seat further on down the hill. After a few minutes of rest, I slide down and take a seat next to him, but he gets up and boards away impatiently, unaware of my bad fall. I tell him what happened, and as inevitably happened after almost every conversation we had that week, it ends in a small argument, and he boards away. I get up and try one last time to get the toe part right, and as I'm sliding down the hill, I lost control yet again, fall onto my back, and slide off-course into what looks like a bunch of deep, packed up snow next to a lodge. So I reach out my hands to try and slow down my impending doom.
I was wrong. It wasn't packed up snow, it was packed up ice, and pocketed with holes from where people had stepped into it. So I slide into it and over it, the holes killing my butt and my back. My left hand hits the ice and the holes with great force, bouncing over all the pockets, until I finally stop. And I just lie there, staring up at the clouds and the great blue yonder.
Now my butt, back, head, and wrists hurt like hell. And this time, I think I did some real significant damage to my wrists again, it hurts that much when I bend it in any direction.
"@#$% this."
I am NOT going to spend my Christmas worrying about how I'm going to pay my doctor's bills because I am without any form of health insurance and because I've re-broken my arm at the wrist. So I go back inside. Take off my clothes. Park myself right in front of the television for the next few hours.
The next day I traded in my snowboard for skis. And everything was hunky-dory for my last day on the slopes.
Parting thoughts
Everyone who works in Aspen is from a different part of the world it seems- Australia, Ireland, South Africa- everyone's nametags tell where they are from. Nick said he'd love to come work in Aspen one winter and just ski all day. I wouldn't mind. But in the end, I think I still prefer the beach to the mountains. For one, when you're skiing, everyone is covered up. So if a girl goes by, you really can't tell how good they look, or how old they are, unless you get real nosey and follow them around until they take off a hat or you hear them talk. I can't tell you how many times I saw a cute girl that turned out to be a high-schooler. At least at the beach, everyone is in a bathing suit.
Aspen is a haven for actors and movie stars. Kevin Costner just married his hot young wife there a few months ago, and they might even have a house in the little ski-town. That said, we apparently just missed Chevy Chase as we were getting fitted for snowboards that wednesday morning. An employee came up from the downstairs shop and told the other workers "You guys just missed Chevy Chase." My brother and I wanted to find him and yell out "Hey Chevy! You were the bomb in 'Dirty Work', Yo!"
Dave Miller said we should have challenged him to a wacky race down the mountain. You know someone would have ended up balancing on one ski. Screwball comedy hilarity would most definitely ensue.
Chrismahannakwanzakka? Where?
This year didn't feel like Christmas at all, and I think I know why.
1. No Christmas Tree: Because my dad has pretty much moved into the new house with his new wife, there were no Christmas decorations here at the old house. No Christmas tree, no stockings, no nothing. Now, there was a Christmas tree at the new house, and PLENTY of Christmas decorations down at my mom's house, but not having Christmas in this house just made the holiday feel a little... empty.
2. No Christmas Build-up: The final days leading up to Christmas, the 18-24th, were spent in Aspen, Colorado, so there was no real lead-up to Christmas. We came home late Christmas Eve, and the next day, BAM, was Christmas. It was kinda like being in a coma for most of December and waking up Christmas morning tired, bruised, and broke.
3. No Christmas Shopping: Many of you would be glad to not be out in the crazy crowds on Christmas, but I love it. I used to drive out to the mall just so I could walk around and take in the craziness, to bask in the insanity as these people ran from store to store, arms full of clothes and toys and gifts people probably didn't need. I love being around the high energy of the season like that. But this year, I did none of it. Partly because I was in Colorado. But partly because I did zero shopping because I didn't have the money. Or I DID have the money, but after the shopping I would have had NO money. I didn't buy any presents this year. Not for anyone.
Actually, I take that back, I did buy a small gift for my mother my last day in Aspen, but that was it. I didn't get anything for my dad, brother, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, or friends. I didn't even send out Christmas cards like I wanted to. And I hate it. I feel so ashamed, I hate it. I hate not participating in the season, and I hate feeling like a jerk for not buying presents for the first time in many many years.
4. No Christmas TV Specials: "A Charlie Brown Christmas" was the only Christmas special I got to see this year. I missed Frosty. I missed the Grinch. And I MISSED Rudolph.
Crap. I love that Bumble Snow Monster when he has no teeth.
All that said, Christmas Eve at my mother's and Christmas Day at my aunt's and grandmother's was fun. We got to my mom's at 10 PM and had a late dinner. Then we opened gifts. The great thing about my mom is she puts up soooo many Christmas decorations. Even the soap dispenser in the bathroom is a Christmas Bear with presents. It's awesome. And Christmas Carols play all the time in the living room, I love it. And in the morning, the whole family goes to my aunt's house where my uncle cooks up a Christmas feast of pancakes, scrambled eggs, and bacon. Enough to feed an army, and with 10 kids and 8 adults, you need a lot of food.
My grandmother showed up dressed as Santa with gifts for everyone. That was unexpected and pretty cool. My brother got a bag of beef jerky. I got a DVD set of The Three Stooges.
Later in the afternoon, we all go to my grandmother's (or my Mamere's, those of you who have heard me speak of her) and exchange gifts, and this is where it gets kind of crazy. Take all those kids and adults, put them in one living room, put my brother and I in charge of distributing presents, say "Ready, set, go!" and watch as the floor disappears under shredded wrapping paper, ribbons, and bows. Everyone opens their gifts at once and more often than not, many presents end up getting lost under wrapping paper or larger gifts. And you can always count on my cousin Jacob to whine about not getting as many gifts as the next person. With him it's all about quantity.
Then we all gather in the dining room (kids in the kitchen) and partake in yet ANOTHER feast, this one concocted by my master chef Mamere. Roast beef, mac and cheese, potatoes, croissants, salad, ham, all kinds of desserts... I'm getting hungry just thinking about it.
Anyway, in the interest of making this blogpost a bit shorter, here's a rundown of just about every gift I received for Christmas.
A ski trip to Snowmass
A full body massage
The Return of the King: Extended Edition DVD
Spider-Man 2 DVD
Freddy vs. Jason DVD
AMC's Reel Clues movie board game
The Three Stooges 2 disc DVD set
A book called The Great American Pin-Up
A wizard marionette from Europe made from porcelain, cloth, and real hair
A little blackbook for sketches and writing down ideas that come to me while out and about
Flat bookmark pens for the blackbook with quotes from great people on them
A sweater
Some boxer briefs
A sunglasses holder for my visor in my car
A Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model wall calendar
A Simpsons Trivia desk calendar
A collection of General Mills breakfast cereal icons in Beanie form that my mother bought with saved up UPC symbols back in 1997 or 1998, had stored in the back closet, and forgotten about until she moved last year. This includes beanie versions of Count Chocula, the Cheerios Bee, Bandit the dog from Cookie Crisp, the Lucky Charms Leprechaun, Trix Rabbit, Cuckoo bird from Coco Puffs, and Wendall the chef from Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
A beer stein from Munich
A lighter from Munich
A Cuban cigar (shhh, don't tell anyone)
A candle and candle holder from Prague
A ceramic, handpainted tile from Prague
A little handmade Jamaican dude puppet on a spring (weird to describe, from Europe too)
Gift cards to Best Buy and Gap
Stocking stuffer candy (American and European)
Other, assorted stocking stuff things
That's about it, I think. To those of you that made it this far, congratulations on surviving this long post. I'd give you a prize if I had the money. I hope everyone had a great Chrismahannakwanzakka, or whatever you celebrate, and please feel free to leave comments describing your favorite gift this year, or amusing stories from the holidays. I have updates to the Great Rat War that I will leave later this week.
Until then, ttfn...
--Cbake
posted by Cbake at 1:14 PM
2 Comments:
you are truely, infinitely blessed. i'm sure you must be humbled by the priceless gifts of happy memories past, present and those to come with loving friends and an abundance of family; by the gift of education, travel, unconditional love, a place to lay down with working plumbing and electricity, "free" time (time is really never free- it comes w/ a price of some sort). you and your loved ones are healthy, your home has never burned down, been blown or washed away. your body has never been brutalized. you have had a lifetime of dental care! you've never been unattractive- you've even been blessed w/ a fair face. how humbled you must feel at the richness of your blessed life!
forget the christmas cards. send a pile of letters, magazines, etc. to the young USA soldiers sleeping in the cold, wet dirt and thank them, encourage them. from what i hear they really could use some mail. Now that is a great way to relieve some guilt and feel good, stronger, wiser, in a way you've never felt before. (getting out of "chris's world" will be a growing experience) please share in a future blog if you take this challenge.
the homeless shelter needs volunteers to greet and serve soup. i knew someone who did this and loved it. made it a weekly thing. the feelings of serving were indescribable and she began to know some regulars. then she started to hug them or touch them in a warm way as she realized they were short on being hugged. very humbling. this is the stuff of life. i fear you may be OVER hugged,loved and indulged. you can unload the EXCESS by making a difference for another human in your community today. do not be afraid to try something new. opportunities are fleeting as you could be paralyzed tomarrow or at a loved one's funeral. today is all you've got.
you are truely, infinitely blessed. i'm sure you must be humbled by the priceless gifts of happy memories past, present and those to come with loving friends and an abundance of family; by the gift of education, travel, unconditional love, a place to lay down with working plumbing and electricity, "free" time (time is really never free- it comes w/ a price of some sort). you and your loved ones are healthy, your home has never burned down, been blown or washed away. your body has never been brutalized. you have had a lifetime of dental care! you've never been unattractive- you've even been blessed w/ a fair face. how humbled you must feel at the richness of your blessed life!
forget the christmas cards. send a pile of letters, magazines, etc. to the young USA soldiers sleeping in the cold, wet dirt and thank them, encourage them. from what i hear they really could use some mail. Now that is a great way to relieve some guilt and feel good, stronger, wiser, in a way you've never felt before. (getting out of "chris's world" will be a growing experience) please share in a future blog if you take this challenge.
the homeless shelter needs volunteers to greet and serve soup. i knew someone who did this and loved it. made it a weekly thing. the feelings of serving were indescribable and she began to know some regulars. then she started to hug them or touch them in a warm way as she realized they were short on being hugged. very humbling. this is the stuff of life. i fear you may be OVER hugged,loved and indulged. you can unload the EXCESS by making a difference for another human in your community today. do not be afraid to try something new. opportunities are fleeting as you could be paralyzed tomarrow or at a loved one's funeral. today is all you've got.
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